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A Don't Hug Me County Fair - Full Length Musical, Comedy

A Don't Hug Me County Fair

Phil Olson, Paul Olson

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Full Length Musical, Comedy

3m, 2f

ISBN: 9780573696282

Book and Lyrics by Phil Olson
Music by Paul Olson
"GO!" - LA Weekly
"A fun romp that is bound to be a popular superhit!" - Grigware Talks Theatre
The summer sequel to the smash hit musical comedies Don't Hug Me and A Don't Hug Me Christmas Carol! It's summer time and the Bunyan County Fair is approaching, the biggest thing that's happened in Bunyan Bay since the winter carnival snowplow parade.

: Acting Edition

Licensing fees and rental materials quoted upon application.


Full Length Musical


Parody / Spoof, Romantic Comedy

120 minutes (2 hours)

Time Period - Present Day

Settings Of Play - A little bar in northern Minnesota. On the walls are stuffed animals, stuffed fish, and beer signs. Photos of the original set can be seen on www.DontHugMe.com. Costuming is simple as well. North woods flannel shirts, jeans, sturdy shoes or boots. Bernice will wear a sexy outfit for her talent event.


Interior Set

Contemporary Costumes / Street Clothes


No Special Cautions


Appropriate for all audiences


Community Theatre, Dinner Theatre, Professional Theatre, Shoestring Budget, Large Stage

A Don't Hug Me County Fair is the summer sequel to the smash hit musical comedies Don't Hug Me and A Don't Hug Me Christmas Carol!

It's summer time and the Bunyan County Fair is approaching, the biggest thing that's happened in Bunyan Bay since the winter carnival snowplow parade. This year the Bunyan County Fair means one thing to Gunner and Clara Johnson, owners of a little bar called The Bunyan; The Miss Walleye Queen Competition. Bernice, the pretty waitress, sees this as her big chance to win Miss Walleye Queen, to be discovered, and more important, to have her face carved in butter at the Minnesota State Fair. The stakes have never been higher in Bunyan Bay. The trouble begins when Gunner's wife, Clara, decides she also wants to win Miss Walleye Queen. Bigger trouble arrives when Gunner's estranged twin sister, Trigger, (played by Gunner) shows up to try to win the beauty pageant.

Featuring 18 original songs including, "My Campfire is Burnin'," "I'm a Bunyan Woman," "If I Could Win Miss Walleye Queen," "Pontoon Ladies,", "I'm Just a Pretty Forest Ranger," and "Our Butter Face Queen." Only 5 characters, a simple set, and it doesn't require a band... A Don't Hug Me County Fair is very inexpensive to produce.


"It's wonderful!" - Dick Clark, TV Icon

"GO!" - LA Weekly

"Riotously funny!" - Norwegian American Weekly

"A fun romp that is bound to be a popular superhit!" - Grigware Talks Theatre

"I love to laugh, and I did!" - LATheatreReview.com

"A howl-a-minute hoot!" - Tolucan Times

"I laughed so hard my sides hurt!... I loved it!" - American Radio Network

"You won't want to miss the fun of this third trip to Bunyan Bay!" - Stage Happenings

"I laughed so hard and so often that I might have damaged some of my sturdy Norwegian innards!" - LA Comedy Examiner

"Thigh slapping fun!...Go see it!" - LA Taco

"100% Sweet!" - Bitter-Lemons.com


Don’t Hug Us, We’re Brothers
by Phil Olsen and Paul Olsen
April 30, 2012

A Don't Hug Me County Fair was first produced at the Lonny Chapman Group Repertory Theatre in Los Angeles, California, in February 2009. It was directed by Doug Engalla.



3m, 2f


Ensemble cast, Drag performance


No Chorus

CLARA JOHNSON - Gunner’s wife, strong willed co-owner of a bar called “The Bunyan,” has been married to Gunner for a long time
GUNNER JOHNSON - Clara’s husband, strong willed co-owner of The Bunyan, a north woods Archie Bunker
BERNICE LUNDSTROM - pretty, young, ex-waitress at The Bunyan; dreams of going to Broadway
KANUTE GUNDERSON - blivious, dense, harmless, full-of-himself business owner
AARVID GISSELSEN - slick, fast-talking karaoke salesman; a north woods “Music Man”
TRIGGER JOHNSON - Gunner’s twin sister, a forest ranger; doesn’t get along with her brother, desperately wants to find a man; played by Gunner
Rental Materials


Piano Only


Classic Broadway, Pop/Rock, Country/Western, Folk



6 Piano/Vocal Scores

Performance/Rehearsal CD

Performance Tracks required for production.  

Song Samples

If I Just Get His Attention

If I Could Win Miss Walleye Queen

Who's Better Catching Fish

We Have Got a Little Problem

Bunyan County Has the Best Fair

I'm Just a Pretty Forest Ranger

When Ya Need to Share Your Feelings, Get a Card

I'm the Man You'll Marry

What Did Gunner Do

How Am I Supposed to Win

Here Come The Walleye Queens

My Campfire is Burnin' For You

Pontoon Ladies

Take Us Out

I'm a Bunyan Woman

Bunyan Bay

Our Butter Face Queen

If I Could Win Miss Walleye Queen (Reprise)

  • Don't Hug Me County Fair

Phil Olson

Phil Olson

Phil Olson grew up in Edina, Minnesota, home of the first indoor mall. His father’s grandparents came over from Norway and homesteaded a farm north of Fargo, North Dakota. His mother’s grandparents also came over from Norway and ended up in Virginia, Minnesota; the iron range. Mr. Olson played varsity football, basketball, and track at Edina East High School, winning the Minnesota State High ... view full profile

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Janet Lytle 5/31/2014 10:01 AM
Our theater is a barn in our neighborhood and we are an adult neighborhood club. We have a strong tradition of putting on a Spring Show annually. Our group is very small and every year I face the challenge of getting enough volunteers to participate. We are an amateur group. Most of the members say they don't want to memorize a full length play's worth of lines, they have busy schedules and many demands on their time. I recognized that I had to get just the right fit to prevent disaster. I presented options (many purchased from Samuel French) for 7 months. When I finally found "A Don't Hug Me County Fair"; I felt like I struck gold! I wanted a comedy with lovable characters. I found those characters in this script. The show has great humor and heart; it did not lose anything from the first time I read it, through show night. The cast of 5 memorized a full length show and handled the songs (it is a musical) beautifully! This Musical Show was easy to produce and perform because it is humanly familiar. Each character is beautifully flawed and hysterical! We had our audience from the intro when Clara says something like "put your cell phones on vibrate...that can be fun" all the way to the end of "Butter Face Queen" The songs are easy to learn and perform. Our audience which was comprised of adults of all ages was very complimentary. They clapped and laughed throughout the performance. If you are looking for a memorable, satisfying, and successful show; I highly recommend "A Don't Hug Me County Fair".

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